I’m on a Tory diet, counting out the beans,
the smallest cheapest loaf, a slice for the
weans, biscuits to crunch, fill the tummy.
Now there’ll be no more, worst of fears,
they’ve shut the Food Bank, Oh! my dears,
they’ve served us for years, dried our tears.
I’m on a Tory diet. Caviar and melba toast,
steak, potatoes, tomatoes, pork roast
choice of vegetables, an apple or pear,
washed down with wine from our cellar.
My children full and warm and dry.
Share with the poor? Not my pie.
I’m on a Tory health plan, its mean,
I can’t afford soap to keep me clean,
I can’t afford shampoo or deodorant
so I’ll smell and feel that I’m unclean.
My old clothes looser; now in mode,
walked head down in our lost road.
I’m on a Tory health plan, and I’m seen,
latest hairdo and expensive creams,
I’ve a wide drawer of Chanel and teams
to wrap me after bathing in sea salt,
oxygen or mud, I shouldn’t ever halt
to avoid the rest who smell to a fault.
I’m on a Tory diet, stay away from shops,
I’ve a pair of holed jeans, worn thin tops
The kids need trainers to go to school,
their coats have come from charity,
I wish the Tory party had honest clarity
cos my two need healthy food and parity.
I’m on a Tory Diet, it’s been good to me.
I am a Tory backer and so glad to be,
they’ve given my money and so with glee,
I can buy what I want and pay no levy
cos I sent it to an island so cleverly.
They took the hymn and cut it,
it really wasn’t fair
to say the rich man in his castle,
the poor man at his gate
yet that’s the way the Tories want it
but it’s still not our fate.
Jesus said we must change things
and see the poor are fed
but the Tory diet,
feeds their friends
while its the law it bends;
and blow the poor, the sick, the lame.
They can’t have a crumb
they’re not the same.
How did we sink to this shame?